Here we go!
My very first bloggidy blog.
If you like what you read, please come back.
If you don't, that's okay too :-)
I have discovered that my greatest teachers right now are my little ones, aged 5 and 1. Master 5 said to me yesterday, with much sadness, "I don't want to be 5. I don't want to keep having birthdays 'cos then I'll be an adult".
"You don't want to grow up to be an adult? You sound sad."
"I don't want to be an adult because it's boring."
I was a little shocked and a lot saddened.
Boring? How can being an adult be boring? Is that how he sees me? Us?
Hmmm, I don't know about you but his comment really touched a nerve. Life really did get quite serious for me somewhere between being a kid and being a 33 year old mum of two! I'm sure this could be understood as being quite boring to a 5 year old.
It's a big responsibility, parenting...to love and protect them, to teach them, to advocate for them.
It's challenging, the most challenging, and exhausting, thing I have ever undertaken. Sometimes I get this parenting gig right, sometimes I get it wrong.
Even though it's not an easy ride, I am so grateful that I have the responsibility to love and teach these sweet little souls.
I do have to question though, in light of our conversation, what example am I teaching my kids? What is the living, breathing lesson I am presenting to them everyday?
That life is serious? I don't like the sound of that.
I think I have a lot to learn.
Master 5 will teach me a good portion of it...
"Oh, adults are boring?" I replied. "That doesn't sound like something to look forward to at all. What about when I jump on the trampoline and we laugh together?" I questioned.
"Oh yeh, I like that." He looked thoughtful.
"What about when Daddy buys remote control cars, just for adults, as well as one for you? That's pretty cool. He still plays with toys!"
My son smiled.
It was a nice conversation but, interestingly, I felt like I had something to prove.
"What about when I laugh at your sister pretending to be a baby when she IS a baby?"
"What about when I ride the scooter?" As I say this I remember that I haven't rode it in weeks, maybe months.
"What about when I sing nursery rhymes with different words, sometimes even silly and rude words?"
He smiled his gorgeous smile and said "Let's jump on the trampoline!", his worries calmed for the moment and an opportunity for me to walk the talk.
I want more of the good stuff.
I want to be in the moment more with my kids and not worry about all my responsibilities all the time; all the jobs that need to be done. I want to not be cranky at tea time when I realise I don't have any clean dishes 'cos I didn't wash any because I was jumping on the trampoline.
Did I say I have lots to learn?
So yesterday afternoon we jumped on the trampoline. I smiled. I attempted to do a somersault, I failed. I jumped holding Master 5 and laughed and cuddled him. I jumped holding Miss 1 while looking at her precious, giggling, innocent face enjoying her mummy's full attention. I watched my son and daughter roll and giggle and wrestle.
We all jumped together.